Remembering Ireland

Sorry, I know this has nothing to do with the overall theme of this blog but I was feeling all "reminiscing like" this morning.  One year ago to the date, Vicki and I embarked on our first expat adventure in Ireland.

Never got around to completing an entire blog of our adventures there. #BiggestRegret But I tried;  see my tumblr: Polish Clover.  One day I might get around to documenting it.  In the meantime, here's a pic of the Guinness that launched my infamous "Guinness Count." I attempted to tally all the Guinness that I consumed during our time in Ireland.  I'd also write notes about where we were and who we were with that type of thing.  It became a pretty cool remembrance of our time there.

Final Guinness Count: 304 (+ or - a few).

"Oss: Our Town. Our Memories." A Video Tribute.

How can you put down in words the experience of living in Oss?  I couldn't, so I made a video instead.  Enjoy and thanks for watching.

Who is "Statie Fles" & Why is She Stealing My Beer Money?

"A La Trappe Quadrupel for €1.29!  A Chimay Blue for €1.47!  HOT DAM, I LOVE THE NETHERLANDS.  Wait, hold up, what's this extra €0,10 all about on my reciept? And what/who the hell is 'Statie Fles'?  Sounds like the name one of those flapper actresses from the roaring 20s." 

The above "blog-amatization" was my reaction upon one of my first beer runs at the Albert Heijn grocery store in Oss, The Netherlands.  But I bet your first reaction was, "Who the hell ever looks at their receipt after a beer run?"  Well my friends DannyZ does; he's all about value.

I highlighted to draw your attention to the prices

Like everything initially in the Netherlands, this €0,10 charge confused me. I later learned it's a type of surcharge or tax placed on your glass and or plastic bottle purchases.  However, don't try it with wine bottles; only works with beer bottles and plastic soda/juice bottles.  I was ticked at first about the surcharge; another nickel and dime scheme. However, I soon discovered these magical machines (below) that give you your money back, well, sort of.

Look for these machines; these were near the FREE coffee machine.

One Friday night, after amounting a fine collection of empty brews, my wife and I set out on a hot date to so some recycling down at the AH.  Here's the video:

Your prize for caring about the environment.

I learned that once you get the slip (pictured above) all you have to do is hand it to the cashier at check out and the money comes off your purchase. This particular day I was €0,65 closer to another delicious La Trappe Quadrupel.

Hats off to the Dutch for their recycling methods...I wonder if Wegmans will ever adopt this practice?

Nederlanders, do you carry all your bottles back to the AH?  Westerners, would you?

Friday Fail: Supermarket Edition

We've been doing so well adjusting to our new "home."  But just when you think you've mastered a simple task such as going to your Dutch grocery store; life comes and bites you in the ezel.

An Ezel

It was a routine shopping trip for tonight's dinner menu, lemon chicken. I  breezed up the produce aisle snagging the last head of broccoli; there was a guy next to me that had his eye on it too, but I was the victor!  As a reward I decided to pick up a La Trappe Tripel, one of my favorite Trappists and brewed in the Netherlands.  Fighting temptation to buy a few more brews, I moved on to the cheese counter, to snap two free samples of Jong Belegen (young belgian) [EDITOR'S NOTE: It was politely pointed out to me I miss translated "Belegen;" it's not "Belgian." See the comment below for correct translation].  Then a quick turn down the wine aisle. There I had to leap over a women's cart who was blocking the entire shelf of Albert Heijn (AH) box wine.  That was it, I was done; off to checkout.

Friday, at 5:30pm usually finds the AH busy with shoppers, and tonight was no exception.   But for some reason I found myself slipping right into the "Pin Only;" no cash, lane with no line.  Could this really be happening?  Placing my items on the belt with a sense of confidence I then handed in my AH bonus card.  Then it hit me.  I FORGOT MY PIN CARD.  I was trapped; another shopper began to place their items on the belt.  Now what?  The sweat began to build on my forehead.  I then tried to explain in broken English how I forgot my pin and started collecting my items. This brought great amusement to the checker.  So I figured no worries I'd jump in the cash lane; only one problem, NO EUROS either.  BLAST!

So again in broken English, I ask the same checker if it was ok to leave my basket and return with my card.  Smiling, since she witnessed my entire conversion from confidence to cowardice she agreed. I then sleeked out of the store, pulled my Philles hat down, and started a light jog back to the apartment. Lucky, I was sporting my Adidas track suit, so it added to my quickness.

Upon my return, the check out girl was ready for me, I think she was "impressed with my speed." Too embarrassed to look her in the eye and out of breath I tried to say "dank u wel" or "thank you" but the words came out jumbled, I have no idea what I said.

Defeated, I began to walk out with my purchases but not without first giving a friendly wave to my friend the Afghani Olive Salesmen. He was with customers so I didn't interrupt him.  Besides, I just wanted to get back and forget about this trip.

On the bright side, I'm guessing the jog back and forth worked off those free samples of cheese.

I Go To Germany For the Spas. Wait, What?

Cologne, Germany in 9 Pictures (and one big picture)

Destination:  Cologne, Germany

Dates: February 16-17, 2013

We went for the schnitzel, the suds, and the spa?   Wait, what was that last one, German spas? Unbeknown to me, Germany has some world renown spas.  Thanks to TripAdvisor, we discovered this fact and penciled in a visit to a one during our Cologne "City Break" vacation.

Our journey to Cologne, was luckily uneventful; considering this cheapskate/logistically challenged individual booked us on a train that had 3 transfers and a total journey time of 3 hours.  Just for some perspective you could have driven that distance in under 2 hours.  But who wants to drive, it's bad for the environment, right?

We arrived in Cologne, around 10:30am, exhausted given our early morning start and the vigorous cardio workout of  trying to catch train connections with just minutes in between. Forget P90X try running from platform 1b at the Nijmegen Station to platform 4b in less than 3minutes with luggage.  (I realize that for folks not in the Netherlands, these details probably mean nothing to you; so just trust me, it's tough)

As we exited the Cologne train station, we marveled at the grandeur of the Cathedral (German: Kolner Dom)  welcoming us to the city. Then the rain started. So, we made the decision to go right to the spa.  Along the way, we crossed the Rhine River and discovered Cologne's "love locks".  If you're unfamiliar with this "art," lovers buy a lock, attach it to a fence together, usually located on a bridge, then the two star-crossed lovers turn a key to lock their love. This loving gesture continues as the couple tosses the key into the flowing water below the bridge. Awe, how romantic.  But what about the padlocks on this bridge? I'd be a little uneasy locking my love with someone who could come back the next day and reuse it.  Wouldn't you?

Can you spot the padlock?

After a 40 minute walk we finally arrived at Claudius Therme Beauty & Wellness Spa.  The place was huge.  Luckily, they equipped us with an English map of the facility (see picture below.)  The first thing we had to navigate was the complicated maze of lockers and dressing rooms. But once we figured out how to get out of the changing rooms which had this crazy locking system, we had our robes and were ready to relax, or so we thought. Our next vital task was interpreting the German signage marking various locations, directions and RULES of the facility.

Why was this task so vital and why did I capitalize RULES?  Well, I'll give you one guess.  Still stumped?  Let's just say, that Europeans and especially Germans are very comfortable with the art of the human body.  Yeah, you guessed it, necked people.  The main area of the spa housed a very large network of pools. I was wondering why it said swimsuits were REQUIRED in this area.  Oh, that's because in the other areas, swimsuits were PROHIBITED. So depending on your comfort level you may have wanted to avoid those other areas.  I'll leave it up to you, the reader, to guess what areas we spent our time.

Don't I look relaxed?

Relaxed and refreshed we said goodbye to Claudius Therme and headed back to across the Rhine.  But we decided we should have a quick drink from the Trinkbrunnen, why not right? 

Bottoms up

 Vicki's expressions says it all here:

We stayed at the Dom Hotel, right next to the Cathedral.  INCREDIBLE location and spectacular views of the Dom.  Editor's Note, if your name is "Dom" get used to seeing your name everywhere and at night in lights!   A TripAdvisor review on the Dom is in the works.           

I wanted to wash that awful tasting mineral water out of my mouth. So, I ordered Cologne's famous drink, Kolsch.  However, I was puzzled when the waitress brought me over a glass of Dom Kolsch.  I examined my libation meticulously   Funny, I remember the beers in Germany being a bit larger? No?  

Left: Me and 4 Maß at Oktoberfest 2012.  Right: Me and a tiny Kolsch February 2013.

I'm just messing.  I know that glass is the proper method to enjoy this easy drinking and deliciously refreshing brew. My favorite had to be the Päffgen Kölsch on tap (right out of the barrel) at Bierhaus en d'r Salzgass.  If you're ever in Cologne, check this place out, great beer, great service and English.  

Let's see, I covered the Spa (did they, didn't they?), the Suds, (delicious), and now onto the schnitzel.  Sadly, I do not have any pictures to share with you, from our dinner at Brauerei zur Malzmuhle.  So you'll need to go there for yourself and experience the revolving door, the friendliness of the staff, the delicious Kolsch (they even had a walnut flavored brew, Vicki's personal favorite), and great food.  Plus they had a menu translated into English, French, Spanish, and even Russian.  I know this turns some folks off, and classifies a restaurant as a "tourist trap," but hey, I was a tourist and Bill Clinton ate here too.  See there website.

On Sunday morning, we woke up and grabbed breakfast from the McDonald's across the street.  Don't judge, the MickeyD's over here are on a whole different level than the ones back in the States.  Besides, I needed an sausage egg & cheese McMuffin after eleventy of those tiny beers from the previous night.  After breakfast we did what every good, upstanding Catholic does on a Sunday morning; visit a Chocolate Museum.

The walk from the Dom Hotel to the SCHOKOLADENMUSEUM KÖLN was about a 15 minute walk along the Rhine.  It was nice and sunny on Sunday, so it made for a nice trip.  Here's the deal, for €8.50 you get access and a self guided tour of the museum and a free Lindt chocolate (plus one more chocolate snack inside).  Do I recommend it?  I guess, but only on a rainy day.  To be honest the first few exhibits (in both German & English) were really sad, both in presentation and in content.  The overall theme seemed to focus on the poor conditions of the cocoa farmers and how we all need to buy fair trade chocolate.  NEAT!  Just what I was hoping to experience from a chocolate museum.  The tour did improve and get less depressing as we entered the sample production facility.  The machines were all operating and you could following the chocolate throughout the entire process from the ingredients to the foiled finished free sample you get with your ticket.

Our last stop, was the majestic Cathedral.  I highly recommend a guided tour.  English tours are offered on Sundays at 2:30pm for €7.00pp. (Click here for tour information.).  This was a much better deal than the Chocolate Museum if you ask me.  The tour lasted approximately an hour and you get to learn about aspects of the cathedral that you might have over looked if you went in on your own.  I had no idea that this Cathedral held the relics of the Three Kings, well supposedly held these relics.  A little Faith goes along way when you hear these types of stories. The tour concludes back in the Cathedral visitor center with a  movie.  You could skip that part, not worth the 20 minutes in my opinion.

Highlights from the Cathedral

After the tour we wandered around the outside of the Cathedral and waited for the Sunday evening service to begin at 5pm.  Okay, I have to rant again on the topic of the Catholic Church being "Universal"(See this post)  During the Mass, people seemed to be doing their own thing. Sit? Sure whenever you want. Stand right in the middle of a reading, why not? Bless yourself, leave, then come back to your pew a little later, of course you should!  Then it was time for Communion.  I've always read and heard about German efficiency.  Well, apparently that does not apply to this sacrament.  In a mad rush the entire congregation surrounded the entire altar, some even flanking the sides.  Vicki and I didn't know what to do, no line down the center aisle?  So we just went with the flow and stood in the massive Communion mosh pit.  But, I will say, it was a unique feeling of community as we all stood around the altar waiting to receive the host.  

  

That about finishes up our whirlwind tour of Cologne.  Beautiful city, plenty to do, see, eat and drink. Definitely recommend a visit and a tour of the Cathedral.  Cheers!

Oh, and since you read to the very end.  Here's a picture of me riding a giant rabbit.  Have a great week!

BEER: A LOVE STORY

I know it's tough to tell, but I had a blast making this DannyZ Film.  The video depicts our magical 31 hours in Brussels.  

The video is totally safe for work, but it may leave you craving a beer and a waffle at the end.

For those wondering "What's the deal with the Smurf?"   Click here.

Brussels in 9 Pictures

Our Adventure to Brussels 2-3 February 2013.

Heineken Count Begins

MY FIRST.  This was my first Heineken since moving to the Netherlands.  (Editor’s Note: not my first ever, I remember some of the first legal beer I ever bought was a case of those Heiniken keg cans)  Just as the Guinness tasted better in Ireland, the Heineken here is amazing.  

While I was in Ireland, I started a “Guinness Count.”  I would note the #, the place and usually who I was with or if something funny happened while drinking it.  It was an awesome way to record some great memories.  When we left, I had a number of questions about what I was going to count while abroad.  Seems like I’ll be counting these little beauties for the next few months.  Cheers.